Tuesday, September 04, 2007
there are lotsa reasons why things happen.
bak kata pepatah melayu, ada udang di sebalik batu.
or better said, ada hikmah disebaliknya.
cewah cewah..
anyways...
there are lotsa reasons to the things i do.
the worse trait about me is that i tend to keep things to myself.
though i try very hard to let everything out, be it small or big..
sometimes i just find it hard to do so.
maybe because i think too much about the other party.
his/her feelings.. his/her reactions.. i rather hurt myself than hurt him/her.(stupid??)
well, maybe i'm just trying to play safe.(being too careful is not good either)
trying my very best not to hurt the other party's feelings.
or maybe i'm just afraid that the person might just think that i'm petty and that i think too much about myself. (because it might just be a small matter to them..and oh, it happened)
yea, i know it's bad.
for me, and for the relationship i have with the person.
because there wasnt any transparency..and good communication.
but i'm still trying my very best though.
maybe not hard enough.
and another bad thing about me.
i think alot.
even the slightest thing that came across my mind, i will think about it.
it's horrible i tell you.
makes me sick sometimes.
and that's one reason why i keep quiet sometimes.
besides having nothing to talk about la...
and why do i think alot?
well, maybe i'm just too sensitive.
and i hate it.
sometimes i tried to control it..be less sensitive..
but sensitivity concerns the heart.
and when it comes to the matter of the heart, no amount of controlling will help. (no?)
again..still trying.
grrr....
hate hate hate.
i'm no perfect person.but i love me.and best part is, people around me love me.yeyy yeyy. much love.
i smiled today 10:04 PM
